NFC Coaster That Tips Itself

Description

NFC Coaster That Dramatically Tips Itself™ is TekCrate’s crown jewel in the fine art of brilliantly pointless gadgets. It’s engineered to baffle, entertain, and make your coworkers question your sanity (or genius).

• Looks Fortune 500-level slick, behaves like a caffeinated cat on roller skates
• All the USB and Bluetooth hoopla—zero actual connections (because why?)
• Telemetry so theatrical it might as well log your snack attacks (spoiler: it absolutely does not)
• Firmware updates that proudly announce improvements to things that don’t exist
• One-click ‘Compliance Mode’—instantly dims the lights so you *appear* to be the boss
• 90-day ‘Theoretical Warranty’—because real guarantees are just so passé

Disclaimer: Perfect for confusing the heck out of your desk neighbors, jazzing up those snooze-worthy meetings, and sparking lively (if entirely pointless) workplace debates. Actual function? That’s just a legend.